Light And Shadow

I've been shooting photos as I've had the chance and lately there has been a lot of contrast in them. Light and shadow; color and neutral. I began thinking how this is sort of like life, and people, in general......
As above with the violet leaves, some people are able to glow deeply through any adversity. They seek that bright spot of light and grow. They are troopers. Their zest for life is infectious. 

Some are protected quite well but can only produce a single bloom. When the petals fall, they stand surrounded by what will envelope them and seldom seem to notice.
Rather than blossoming abundantly they limit themselves to one shot, and occasionally not even that. Their buds are nipped from a stray frost, they are swallowed from bound roots of their own making. The leaves close; the fruit withers.

Some are like the photo above, which for the most part describes my friends~~full, exuberant, putting joy into the world and just exploding with the delight of life. A group that, brought together, make a fragrant and exceptional addition to the path we all walk. (I would hope these for anyone!)
The brave, busting out even in the cold, they live their life in a state of grace. Their happiness is contagious. 

Those who seem to flourish the most beautifully may live in rocky soil, and never complain. They are so deeply grounded that all one sees is the delight of the blossom. Quiet and true, they don't intentionally draw undue attention nor intrude.
They just love.
Always.
Deeply.

And then there is me.....the stem that bends with the wind. Accepting the change and still standing, even as parts of the *old me* are gently being peeled away, flying off, not to be seen again.
But the root here is so deep~~blooms will come again.
Through sun and rain, hot and cold.
Waiting patiently with my face to the sky.
Happy in simplicity.
Wrapped in the tall grass.
Warmed by the sun.


Pax....

Flitting In.....

Time flies when you're having fun, but when you're kind of out cold.....well....I feel I have neglected this blog forever.

Had a little *fly about* and am landing for a moment.

I actually have a bit of art to photograph when I am back to par; one piece is fighting me tooth and nail, the other is finished. That's just how it goes~~art has a mind of it's own, and YOU better not mind! LOL!
Down time has given me lots of time to think, write and mull my work, my direction and what, in general, makes me the happiest.
It also brought up that I *STILL* want a bottle tree in my yard and I have wanted a votive holder/kneeler from an old church FOR EVER and have not a clue where to begin the search.
Odd how these things pop in the head and circle and circle, never really leaving, just hiding a bit and reappearing when you least expect it. (I have no idea WHY it is I need these...I just do)
The bottle tree is manageable; the votive holder/kneeler is going to be a very very long shot.
In the meantime I am still trying my best to get back in one piece and hope that by next week I am going at full speed, damn the torpedoes again. Hey, I can dream!
So if you come across a church that really wants a GOOD HOME for an old votive candle stand......ummmm......point them my way, eh?
Til later, when all the brain cells are working and I have something amazing to post....




Pax....

Rising......

(taken before a foggy morning....still cool and comfortable)

I am opting for a single photo today. This one is so lovely, I don't want to detract from it with others.
I had considered no words too, but then, that would be too much of a strain... ;-)
Heading for the porch with coffee and going to enjoy the break of day. We are blessed with a cool morning, and this is when High Summer becomes both bearable and beautiful. Haze and damp followed by heat to escape from. The world a mix of shadows and sun in the early hours. All for those who are intrepid enough to wake and carry camera.
A moment of quiet meditation before the start of a hectic day.
Join me.


Pax....

While I Should Have Been Working........

.....well, I've been DISTRACTED. Uh huh, I hear those little snickers of laughter. You know me.

Do a search for "Wordle" and you'll get the most used words on your blog......FUN!

What can I say?
It takes so little. *sigh*
I am still working on the house and studio, and managed to get one table CLEAN, as in, I can see almost all of the top. That, in and of itself, is a miracle. But little things get me sidetracked. Like this:

 

Yeah, I couldn't resist the pattern or the price. It lights the studio up like a bonfire. (it matches the flames on my car too, sooooo, it had to come home)

And then there were these Doc Marten's I could not, repeat, NOT RESIST.....and they kind of got me a little sidetracked too.....

Oh yeah!!!! These totally ROCK! Ed Hardy tattoo/argyles to finish off the mix!

They are just so *me*. And another purchase at a good price! (yes I am a tightwad of frightening proportions)

Remember I said I was thinking about doing a tutorial at the same time I was trying to clean? Like that was going to happen.....ha. Not in this lifetime or the next, but it will get up here soon. Anyway, here is a sneak peek at one of the things I want to cover; pattern on printed paper.

Sorry, no nail polish that day.....but I am digging some Blood Red Nails now!

It is fun, easy and painless.

Unless you drop a book on your foot while digging through piles. Please don't let me think I'm the only one with too many books....

Well, just a short pop in so you know I have not been sucked up the sweeper or actually become a good little housewife and am worrying that my whites are not bright enough or how I'm going to get those pesky stains out of the grout on the kitchen floor.

That's what throw rugs are for.

You throw them down, it's covered up.

Easy.

And now, I need to pretend like I'm going to get something of merit accomplished so until later....which hopefully will be the paper tute.....

Pax....

 

End Of Day…..

(click to enlarge)

Above

The sky is warming.

I see the mists from jets

So far away.

I wonder where their

Contrails lead my musings

And wander in this

Golden time of day.

The ether

Catching magic glow,

And I,

A lone observer

Here below.

I capture only

Hints of what I see

And wish, perhaps,

Those contrails

Carried me…..

Pax....

Small Amusements.....

(this is me.....I haven't done enough of this lately because I feel OLD.....)

I am so late today......and most unhappy that I did not take time to write yesterday, but I began rooting through FOUR YEARS of scraps in a scrap basket that was literally falling apart. In the studio clean-up, I made the brave decision to tackle that D*MNED basket, which--in reality--is a rolling, three part laundry hamper with the mesh netting and pop together PVC tubing on casters.

Or, pop apart, as in this case.

It was overflowing.....I was too ashamed to take a picture of it. All I could do as I emptied and emptied and emptied was ask myself why I let it get this far along...... (because you knew the work would suck, Anne, that's why!)....and how I could cram sooooo much in so little space.

I spent most of the day making three piles:

1. Keep and try and figure out how to sort

2. Good things that could be donated

3. The "what are these and why did I keep thems?" that promptly went into the trashcan

While this all sounds easy, it was a most unbelievable MESS. I had the freshly cleaned cutting tables piled high with fabrics that had to be reduced to semi-sorted pieces in clear plastic bags, so I knew what I had. I had thrown into the basket co-ordinated piles of fabrics that were quilt ideas. The oddest thing of all was there were only a couple of shreds of fiber that I did not know where they came from.

Now, considering the fact that after "Hip: Uno" and "Hip: Redeux" my brain is jello, I was stunned to be able to look at long buried tidbits of fabric and say, oh, that is from this quilt, and I remember doing that one, and my gosh, I didn't think I had ANY left after that large top. And most of these? They were gifts, donations, etc. Things I no longer have, and probably don't even have photos of.

Just these clear images floating within the jello in my cranium.

Most humorous......most annoying too, in that half the time I can't remember if I've left lights on, shut and locked the door or if I'm even dressed properly to go out.

Ah well.....

On to the image below.

Hopefully none of you remember my rant a good while back about the CC company that had my business for almost 20 years, and then due to their own bad investments in sub-prime mortgages, passed that pay off on to their customers in the form of exorbitant percentage rates.

Well, I went shopping for a new place to give my business, and yes, I found a new company, and yes, that IS my artwork on the card, and YES, I decided to offer it as a design others could pick too. Why not? I was going to keep it strictly as a one-of for me, but hey, we need a little more love flying around this world......put it out there. Have a good vibe about it.

As the post was titled, these are indeed small amusements, but sometimes, those are the best.

Now I'm off to put a bookcase together before my DH arrives home early today (I did not ask why, though I am sure he has work to do.....) and life as I know it takes an about face! LOL!

Sorry the brain dribble is nominal this morning, but somedays, there is only so much I can wring out of the grey matter! It appears to be a little on the arid side at the moment....

To all of you, have fun, be creative, and above all else.....

Pax.

Delivery Today

I will be off on the road today installing the church banners. This is just a quick teaser to show the tassels that I built for the center point of each of the pieces. I can't describe the weight on these alone; some of the beads don't show well in the photo. I'm going to have to remember to pick up some batteries before I hit the road too, as I am sure I have drained the set in the camera.

It was a great relief yesterday to complete this project that started before my fall last year. It was just one of those *utterly wipe you out* things......I got the inner portion of the car covered with a quilt, and gently lugged the behemoths out there, smoothing them so the canvas letters would not get curled, tucking them in so nothing got stuck when I closed the Cruiser hatchback.

It was odd because the fancy bottom edges were peeking out and I thought how it reminded me of an ornate wedding gown.

I am going to attempt to get up in the choir loft to get photos of these hanging, but then, it is not Easter yet so they may not put them up. If that is the case, I'll stretch them out on the floor and shoot down, to have a better visual record of them.

I think the desire to get them out had an effect on me not doing the usual photo-recording of the process along the way. I burned a couple of shots the other day when I was still stabbing the canvas letters into place, but overall, not much in the computer.

Perhaps that is okay....too many memories attached to this work, through no fault of their own.

I am completely mentally and physically exhausted, and also relieved that they are going. This may be, after the delivery, a great *nothing done day*......LOL!!! (and I feel like I am trying hard to catch cold too....pfffft!)

Tomorrow I'll get a better post of pics, etc up.

Today.......hmmmm.......I'm doing good to hammer keys and sort brain dribble.

So have a good one, enjoy your day whatever you do and remember.....Spring is somewhere out there (just not in Indiana yet!).

Pax.

Worthy Of ENOUGH......

(Thanks to everyone who has responded on these posts; it has been a great privilege for me to be entrusted with different personal views and stories. Tomorrow's post will finish the series; for those of you who have read all along the way, I hope there has been something you can take with you & ponder!)

I have had ENOUGH!
I have ENOUGH!

How different those two statements are. They express almost opposite sentiments and yet flow off our tongues quickly and easily and sometimes the first one is what we say more. So let's delve a bit deeper into being Worthy of Enough.
We all have to set personal limits. It can be a difficult and frightening thing to do, especially when most of us were raised to please others, to never retort, to be silent and unseen. Humanity was not created to live in that particular vacuum, in stasis---we were meant to live in the sun and interact honestly with those around us. Therefore, getting to the point of being able to say (in whatever circumstance is appropriate in your life) "I have had ENOUGH!" is not an easy road.
In fact, the first part of this post links in with yesterday's post about Courage....it takes a lot to say it, mean it, and stand by it. It takes a lot of self worth to know when you are at that point. It is important to verbalize when enough is really much more than enough. I feel sure we've all walked that bumpy rocky path at some time, and hopefully have reached deep within to cut loose with a loud "ENOUGH!" and then moved forward.

Now, on the flip side of the coin.......are you worthy of *enough* and what is it???
Enough is not succumbing to the fads and flings that surround us daily. Enough is wisdom gained from age, experience, mistakes.....things that have impacted us and we know that the pursuit of the superfluous is, well, superfluous. (and yes, I did have to look that one up in the dictionary for the correct spelling!)
Being worthy of this kind of *enough* is being centered, wise, taking delight in the moments that pass rapidly. It is accepting what we have (in terms of property) and making the best use of it. It is realizing that no matter how little we feel we have, there are those with much less; both in spiritual realization and in the very physical realm of a hard economy.
It is not easy writing a positive statement when I look around the area where I live, and on a daily basis see people doing without due to massive job outsourcing. But there again, it hones a sharper perspective for me of exactly how I am blessed with and worthy of ENOUGH. What I have is more than sufficient, so how do I share and do it with respect towards the integrity of others?
How do I learn to be content in a mass media market constantly pushing more and more into my wallet cross-hairs......trying to coerce me to buy-buy-buy? (remember Anne....Enough...)
How do I walk away from the sales, the bargains, the *things I need*...(do you Anne? really?)
Do I cloister myself away and ignore all I can? Do I need blinders and ear plugs? Do I need to just not leave the house?
Well, in my case, yes. Sometimes that is what I do. And that is when I find, within myself, my studio, my heart and my life, that I am worthy of many many moments that are Enough.
You are worthy of that too. The moments of peace, without want, without greed, without fear, without pressure; when the very act of being is Enough. You deserve that, and the wonderful sense of everything being right in your world that comes with it.
What you have within you, in your soul, in your psyche, in the deepest recesses of your heart-of-hearts is enough and you are worthy of knowing that and not having anyone try and make you feel less.
You are completely ENOUGH.
And I like you that way.
If I remember correctly, the quote in the photo is from a book read back in my childhood, which I believe was "Rabbit Hill" and it hit the nail on the head......

"There is enough for all."

And you're worthy.

Pax.

Worthy Of Courage

(Not unlike the Cowardly Lion, we all--at some point--ask if we will ever find courage, and thus begin our worthiness quest......)

There is a specific reason I chose to write about courage on this date; one year ago today, at approximately 9:50 in the morning, I propelled myself across our garage, arms flailing, loads of art flying, my body bouncing off hard items and managed to become airborne, before landing at the front of the garage, directly on my right femur head, feeling the femoral neck break as it hit the concrete floor.
I was alone.
No cell phone near, nothing.
I laid in pain, shrieking as only a person severely injured can. It is that primal sound that comes from your gut. It is something you do not want to hear.
I had no choice but to roll myself over, use my left leg to stabilize the broken right hip, and crawl hand over hand the full length of the garage, back to my studio, up four steps, and reach the phone to call my husband. (and yes, this was all in excruciating pain....)
Was this courage? I don't know. People have described it as such but I prefer to think of it as some innate survival instinct. You don't know what you're capable of until it happens. Then the adrenalin kicks in.
Today, March 11, 2010, I feel courageous. I am WORTHY of saying that. I have survived one bad surgery, one great surgery, am on my third bout of physical therapy and am determined beyond belief that I am going to function like I did before. That is where the courage kicks in.
When you are down, when the people you thought were friends quickly scamper away like rats leaving the sinking ship, when you realize projects you have sunk your heart into are gone, when you finally PUT YOUR NEEDS FIRST---that is courage.
It is a difficult quality to pinpoint, and we are pretty well brainwashed into thinking of *heros* as courageous......but like the great garage fall, most of the time, it is gut instinct or training at play. I am not saying there is not bravery of a certain sort involved---but we are dealing with a different animal, though closely related.
You are worthy of the courage to stand and speak when something is not RIGHT; morally, ethically, politically. You are worthy of that because within you there is a voice that needs to be heard, and it takes a tremendous amount of courage to speak up and not back down.
Courage is reaching out to those who are normally forgotten, when you may be socially ostracized, when there is the very good chance that emotional hurt will be involved. Courage is digging deep to face personal issues head on and not sweep them under the carpet and not be swayed when you know what you must do.
Courage is that moment when you know you cannot live by foolish rules set down by others, and define your own set of life-rules, and then daily, stick to them.
It is the fire in the belly, the conviction in your soul, the temper you feel rise in your blood.
You are WORTHY of this.
Why?
Because then, you will be living your own life, and not one planned for you by someone else. You will be walking unwalked paths, gaining knowledge and strength each step of the way. You will be sturdy like the oak but bend like a willow when you must.......because sometimes courage involves silence. To think, to decide, to ponder how to proceed.
We are most worthy of these qualities because we are finite creatures, and with courage, we can leave a footprint that will be followed by others.
Yes, you can break away.
Yes, you can seek your dreams.
Yes, you can succeed....because you have gone forward courageously. You certainly are worth that....are you not?
My journey is not over. My courage failed when I was assigned this last therapy round. I felt sorry for myself, pondering the loss of a year of normal life, and at 50, it's a lot different than when you are younger. I wanted to retreat, to sit and withdraw, to try and forget how I had been in my *previous existance*.....the tall blonde woman in the tight swishy dress and high heels, the firebrand, the perpetual joker. I thought for sure it was all gone. How much more could I go through, emotionally and physically? Was this endless? Was the pain endless?
Then that devilish little fire-starter in my belly tuned up and reminded me I have places to go, things to do, stillettos to wear and many people left to annoy!
And so, I step forward again, courageously, to prove I am worthy of this. And I will be whole again.
Join me. Prove your worth.

Oh, by the way. No more flights across the garage....I think I'll walk the next time....   ;-)

Pax.

P.S. Home from PT, and I have worked so hard, I have only TWO MORE SESSIONS!!! And I did tell them I had been crawling on the sewing tables, up ladders, lifting bookcases........maybe they're sick of me.....LOL!!!

Out With The Old..........

....and in with the New Year, coming quite quickly! I keep asking myself where 2009 went, but at this point it is a moot question. It is gone.....along with a lot of harsh moments, some avoidable, some not. I am actually looking forward to 2010 in a number of ways: art, health, blog, friends. And not necessarily in that order. I think the friends know they come first, then the blog......
I am not, nor ever have been, a person for New Year's Resolutions as I think most who make them would say they fall by the wayside far too fast, but I do think there are areas of life I want to reexamine, revamp and in general, try for a better self, thus making 2010 a better year.
I had considered a laundry list of things I wished I could have changed in 2009, but then was struck with "WHY?" We all have them and they prove useless in looking forward.
So here is what I hope for my readers in 2010:

--More time for quality time in your lives
--More creativity and learning
--More in the way of peace and health both mentally and physically in a world that pulls us every other way
--More realization of the good that we all have now
--More vision to see the possibilities in our futures
--More belief in yourselves, your work, your abilities
--More love, plain and simple

If that doesn't start making you feel glowing and cozy, then how about something to make you laugh???

Ring in the New Year in a fun way, party like an animal and be safe!!! And I'll meet you right back here, next year!!!

To all of you who have been part of this blogging adventure in 2009, I thank you. Truly. And until next year, I bid you.......

Pax.

"Liberty Prevails"

Last evening was the reception for the "America" show at the Honeywell Center in Wabash, Indiana. While I have had this piece for some time, I asked the gallery director if there would be any issue with it being submitted to the show. She was fine with it as it had not hung there before, and it garnered me an Honorable Mention, and was hung directly behind the speakers podium, so yes, there is a microphone kind of visible in the photo!
By the time you are reading this, I will either be on my way to the Imagine Center or still sitting in a dither with coffee, hoping I can hot-foot it to the Imagine Center in time for my appointment!
Thanks to everyone for all the support yesterday. I'm posting this because it was too late when I got in to work, and I was too tired to boot.
You get a bonus post.
Is your day not MADE????? LOL!!!!
I am not sure if the quote on the top of the piece is readable when clicked; worse yet, I am too lazy to go get the quilt to post it here, but basically it thumbs it's nose at terrorism because in every culture blood has been shed in awful manners for liberty, and though Sept. 11th was heinous, we are still here.
We are still a country.
We still love and grieve and have our lives and go about our business and realize even more so now that liberty is a precious and valuable thing; not limited to man made structures but limited to what we allow our hearts and minds to accept and pursue.
Accept love and diversity, wisdom and pondering of such, and pursue the truth.
Always.

Pax.

Last Green of Summer; A Productive Day

Random thoughts from a lovely, sunny Fall day........

It seems of late I have posted about a lot of things NOT getting done or going well. Yesterday was one of those rare days you get many things done, but it feels like it went quick and easy.

First off, I love this heart shaped leaf from a volunteer Redbud tree. We have lost a lot in Indiana to some blight brought in from out of state trees sold at cheap discounters. Bleah! This one was so perfect.......that bit of bronzey-red atop the large green leaves. Click the pic for better detail; I left the size fairly large.

The Rose Live Forever along the drive has managed to survive quite well. I've run over the edges a few times with the car, the raccoons had a hey-day in it, the bunnies *prune* it. It just grows. And blooms. I can ask for nothing better!

I spent most of the day checking things off my to-do list:

Car tire fixed.

Grocery shopping done.

Laundry in some stage of *done-ness*.

Changed settings on FaceBook Apps.

Worked a lot in the studio on the church banners......though, again, that doesn't *show*.

Cleaned the kitchen, somewhat.

Had time to sit and laugh with hubby.

Did some lengthy art related research online for a possible purchase.

Spent time doing some heavy decision making.

Took a break to wander through the yard for a moment and enjoy the last of the green.

Finally, sat to deal with e-mails, etc. that had piled up and print out some necessary paperwork.

Avoided the dreaded cleaning out of photos from the blog folder and also other places on my computer, as that is a two day process and I needed to sew. That's okay.

My post count is rising and it seems that just yesterday I was setting the blog up, wondering what to write, or who would read. What was the purpose? Was it for my own benefit? In the interim, I have found out otherwise. I've found my voice again, I have found delightful friends, I have learned, I have shared my knowledge, I have shared laughter and tears and triumphs and the skinned knees of life. I've become part of a larger vocal and visual chorus that I enjoy immensely. Heading into the dark of the year is not as daunting with my network of fellow followers and casual readers, and those whose blogs I visit regularly. I wish (selfishly) that those who visit, even once, would post just a hello to have an idea how far this reaches. But it's okay anyway.....

Thank you. We are each a link in a long line of voices and visions. Let's keep it unbroken.

And now, I am off to work, sewing most likely, though something else always seems to get thrown into the mix. I think there is a cake that needs baking too.......

Pax.

A Feel Of Fall In The Air

Lushness of wild grapes in a heavenly frosty dark violet....

.....The glow of Goldenrod against the pines......

....One lone Jewel weed glowing in the afternoon sun....

.......The perfect mushroom, fanning out an umbrella of textured white and beige......

....Awaiting the explosion of fluff and seed from Milkweed pods......

.......a perfect Thistle, giving up pollen to a tiny bee, soon to be gone for the season......

Cool evenings, a yard wet from dew, the rich colors of things that seem to begin that Fall Glow.....it may not be all that close but it is definitely on the way. And I am ready! Enough of the Summer heat and hustle---I want the lovely purples and yellows and oranges of the cool of the year. That delightful rustle of leaves in the evening breeze, the smell of the earth going to sleep for the Winter.
Out comes the leather jacket, and gloves......hand knit socks and soft sweaters, flannel pajamas and bunny slippers. Hot tea any time of day and the perfume of raising bread dough, ready for the oven. Pies, jams, cookies and heavy roasts. Pulling out soft, thick afghans and putting away the light Summer quilts.
And Halloween and pumpkins and hobgoblins!
Enough, Summer---be gone! Give me the season I love most!

Pax.

Corralling *The Little Pirate* (or why mothers turn grey)

(Elinor Frances Stewart Huskey July 31, 1923- August 30, 1990)

Yes, that is me with my poor mother hanging on for dear life. We were on board the U.S.S. Patch, headed for our station in Germany in the mid-sixties. And why is she holding so tightly to that Little Pirate??? Because I had a tendency to run as fast as my fat little legs could go and jump! I had this thing about water (still do, though I swim atrociously!) and if someone didn't nearly have me on a leash, I'd be in it.
And I couldn't swim.
No fear. Or maybe it was no brains. ;-)
Mother spent her life trying to reel me in, all the while I was pulling hard, trying to reel myself out. I think the expression says it all......no smile, no cooperating, no giving in, just pure determination. No wonder she wanted me to join a convent, to keep me out of trouble! And seriously, I considered it for a good while, but it was that *unquestioning obedience* part that steered me away.
I learned a lot from her; cooking, embroidery, we had a few vain attempts at knitting until I taught myself. I remember wash day with the laundry baskets lined with plastic from the cleaners, holding the starched, damp and rolled clothing, awaiting the iron. Everything was so fresh afterwards!
I managed to ruin many dresses with bouquets of dandelions for mother; the milk from the stems leaving a trail of brown dots across the cotton........mom would patiently embroider little Lazy-Daisies on each stain, with French Knots in the middle, thus making the dress fit to wear again.
I thought it was tres cool.......it wasn't until I was an adult that I realized she did this because we did not have the money to buy new clothing at the rate I buzzed through my wardrobe. In fact, I was well protected from the fact that due to monthly military pay, at the end of each month, my folks were counting pennies to make it to the next paycheck.
While I was highly encouraged in art, dance and music by mom, I was crushed and disillusioned when, my senior high school year, ready for college and planning on an art degree, I discovered that it was not happening. My god-parents controlled my college fund and they would only agree to what they chose for me to do. Me? An anchor person on some local news broadcast? Give me a break!!!! (or just take a look at that face in the picture....says it all....)
And so, that was the end of a lot of dreams and hopes and the beginning of a tremendous amount of really bad behaviour and being a rebellious little stink in general.
Maybe that is why there is only one photo with this post---because those were still the happy years, without my aunt and uncle involved in our lives, and mom and I were good friends. Maybe it is normal for a daughter to revolt against her mother at some point, to try and leave the nest. Maybe I just like this sweet memory, and the pic really expresses my disposition du jour, or even now. Too determined, too inflexible. Certain of where I am going despite warning.
No matter...........rest peacefully mother.
I turned out okay...............more or less.

Pax.

Sunrise Through A Lazy Fog........

In Indiana, morning fogs like this are a sure sign that Autumn will soon be peeking around the corner. DH was leaving for work early the other day and as I was opening the garage door for him, I was greeted with this amazing sight; fog so very thick, hanging in an elevated blanket and the sun reflecting through it and off it!
I promptly ran into the studio, nightclothes flying, house shoes flopping, grabbed the camera and burned off several shots. In the moments I was out there, the sun was slowly rising, making each picture distinctly different. Some had lens flare, some didn't, but all were beautiful in their own way. It was tough to pick ONE for the blog......and I figured posting all of them would insure you that I am OCD. (ahem) I prefer to think that I was just trying to preserve each moment of a spectacular event, a gift from the universe. Sounds better that way, yes?
With the fungus popping up in the yard and leaves falling from trees, I am wondering if we will have a colorful Fall or if the rains will move in and end this dry Summer with wet and dreary days. No matter; I have work piled up to do. Yesterday my banner sewing turned into a surprise visit from a friend, and thus my day was spent not working but talking, reminiscing and e-mailing.
That's okay.
The thing I need to teach myself is there are only so many hours in a day, and so many times I get the chance to laugh with lifelong friends. The work will be done, the house can wait, dinner is always fixed for hubby.............everything moves on.
And every morning that I can, I check for sights like this one, to remind myself what a marvel this great globe is and what a small and infinitesimal part I play. Yes, I record events, make art, decorate sanctuaries with banners, but ultimately, a sunrise like this one puts it all in perspective.
I am content with being *small*.
And pleased that I get to share something this *big*.
I hope your day is brilliant!

Pax.

250th Post........A Little Background Story: This Camera Buff

I probably should have something more spectacular for a *special number* post, but a good portion of my creative life came from learning photography from my father. Dad was a fine photographer---living in the era of 620 film (oh I can still smell the wrappers the rolls came in!), Speed Graphic cameras that had the film plates you had to load in a darkroom (and so large they required a trunk to carry them!), Roliflex cameras where everything in the viewfinder was upside down, and doing your own black and white work. Digital, Photo Shop, and all the other things we take for granted did not exist. This was the day of man, machine, emulsion and chemical.
And magic.

Thus I learned how to shoot the old fashioned way (not sure I remember much, other than framing up a shot!), load and develop my own film which I'm sure I could still do, work under safe lights and grew accustomed, and yes, even somewhat fond of the smell of stop-bath! Think vinegar, times 1000.......
Everything was measured exactly, temps of the chemicals had to be perfect, paper fresh or kept in dark, climate controlled conditions. Photography was truly an ART. He moved with an ease only those who had committed a goodly portion of time to work and learning of the rules would have. He was graceful in his art.

And you could do everything exactly right and still have a lousy print. Spent developer, a pack of old paper, old chemicals if you forgot to mark the bottles, over exposed, underexposed.......there were a host of *surprises*.
None the less, I loved the hours spent in the darkroom watching him work. Burning and dodging, making a vignette tool from a cigarette cellophane wrapper and a piece of paper, using his hand to gently reduce light from the enlarger in a small area of paper, slowly counting off seconds before we owned a timer to get proper exposure for the print, knowing from a negative how the positive would look, squinting through a photographer's loupe to examine the film for scratches or some lost detail.......it was, in a way, slight of hand, much like a magician.
He spoke in a language of F-stops, apertures, and fractions of seconds; sepia tones, warm and cool papers and resin and matte finishes. It was an exotic music to the ear.

Now I shoot, upload, crop and post. I seldom do anything fancy---I like a photo as it is. My programs on this computer are quite simple, for the most part. I burn through double A batteries in my zest to get the shot I want. I shoot too many variations of one thing (just like dad!), with little difference. I wander through the yard and seek photo-fodder. I have a mass of images stored that need sorting and some deleting.
This era is far too easy. A good camera and a good eye will get a decent shot. Photo Shop can correct almost anything. And no, I don't use it, nor do I know how. I am a luddite in that respect. Dodging and burning is done with a cursor and a mouse. (mostly me cursing!) Cropping is a click and roll instead of an easel with adjustable edges, or strips of cardboard in the case of an odd sized print. Vignette is a click of a button and adjusting the amount of area and the background color. The satisfaction is NOT the same.

I miss those days of film rolls, Kodak yellow, standing in a suffocating dark closet to load a roll of film into the tank reel for developing and the sound of the slow click of a lens when the camera, tight on a tri-pod, was set to *Bulb*. I miss lugging the equipment, the excitement of that first faint image beginning to show as I gently agitated the paper in the developer tray, the impatience of waiting for the paper to go through all the baths and then, to hold my soaking wet print in full light, in my hands, still reeking of chemicals. I miss the work of photography. I miss not knowing what I was going to be holding, and having to wait for it, to earn it.
It was a joy. And I would pass it along, or recommend it to anyone if you can set up a darkroom. A small area, access to water and the ability to close out the light, and the world, and enter the delightfully eerie and heart-thumping universe of developing your own prints.
There is nothing like it.
Really.
REALLY.
Creativity emerging from the ether........or in this case, a tray full of Kodak developer.

Pax.