Thursday, March 1, 2012

When The Clouds Part.....

Taken in my living room, quickly, when the bright morning sun illuminated everything in glorious detail for a few short moments.
Yesterday was my check in and #5 chemo. I knew my ca-125 results would be back, and I had worried/not worried about the levels.
Since I was pretty much out in the stratosphere when the baseline was drawn in November (almost 13,000 with a norm of 35 or less....yeah, I am such an over achiever!) I awaited, and at the same time dreaded, hearing results. Because it is an indicator of how the chemo is working, and since it was taken right at the halfway point~~so there would be three of the six left~~I was UNSURE.
And I shouldn't have been because I know the love and care I have received especially in large portions from the blog-world, but still one doubts.....momentarily. And then you lock that away and get on with getting well.
When the Dr. said that it had dropped to 734, I was stunned to silence for~~oh~~five seconds. Approximately a 94% drop at the halfway point. (isn't it odd how numbers take over your life during these endeavors?) Then he continued, saying with the remaining chemo, when we did another draw, there was a fair chance it could be close to or in the normal range.
Again, stunned silence from me before the joyful outburst.
I am still pinching myself--yes, there is ample to pinch--and I have to thank everyone who has shown support and sent good thoughts, prayers, white light or remembered me in their meditations, because those are such an important part of recovery.
And I thoroughly intend on recovering, so I can be around to stumble through posting to blog and in general, annoying everyone.  ;-)
The other thing that popped into my brain was I had received this news on a date that would not appear again for four years.....in essence, not a date I can remember yearly because it's just not there.
There is something odd and good in that, yet sort of sad in a peculiar way. (again, the numbers thing)
But it is how it should be.
And I am so thankful, and happy.
May you be so too.


Pax....

31 comments:

brandi said...

~good morning...GOOD MORNING...good morning!!! oh you had me holding my breath as i was reading....my dear friend...heres to celebrating you...your spirit...your strength and your body...amazing the powers of prayers and a strong WILL to fight...we will continue to hold you in our hands and carry you in our thoughts...keep pinching yourself...its real!!! may you continue to feel the love and blessings shining brightly upon you~

Janet Ghio said...

Oh Anne--I am so glad for you!! What encouraging news!!

Debra She Who Seeks said...

SUPER NEWS! I'm so happy for you -- keep up the good work, eh?

Anne Huskey-Lockard said...

Hey all,

I feel like I've been given a second wind, and just when I needed it most too!
I shall fight till I fall over, which in these tight jeans today, could be sooner rather than later....LOL! ;-D
And, I *WILL* get back to art posts as soon as I can get a little further along here.

XXOO~~
Anne

Silke Powers said...

You know how happy I am for you!! Everything is coming together in beautiful results... Leaping toward perfect health!! Love, Silke

Numinosity said...

So happy for you...and the world you possess and grace!
xoxo Kim

Unknown said...

Oh Anne what wonderful news! Saying prayers for you even harder now. Yipee!

Cameron said...

That is EXCELLENT news, Anne!! I'm so happy to hear your progression and giggle at your wit and humor....and marvel at your strong conviction!
You are never a bother.....never think that!

keep up the good fight...we're all pulling for you!!

Jo Murray said...

Oh Anne... I couldn't be more delighted for you. Great news indeed. Keep up the good work.

Robin said...

Dear *FBBBFF*....typing fast as Blogger has devoured my last 2 comments! EGAD! It is rainy and cold here....but your news has warmed my day and my heart! WOO-HOO!!!!!! Fantastic news!
Although we all love and adore you, it is YOUR Faith and Courage that has helped you most....you are one AWESOME lady! God know this...he is here to help you stay strong.

I love the photo....it says more than words...

And...how very *Anne-Appropriate* for you to receive the news on Leap Year Day! All our hearts lept with you!!!

Love,

♥ Robin ♥

Janine said...

Ohg what wonderful, wonderful news. I am so glad and happy for you.

Jan said...

This was the best news I have heard all year, so happy for you. let the prayers and good thoughts continue flowing your way! It is an odd thing to consider, that you received the news on leap day. So you have to wait another 4 years to celebrate the anniversary but I know you will be here to do so.

Magpie's Mumblings said...

There are some pretty big halleluiahs heading heavenward right now Anne. I'm so very glad that you're doing well. Keep up the good work girl, and we'll keep up the prayers!

Lost Aussie said...

Yay! Yay and Yay! You get on with getting well, we will keep on with the prayers!

studio lolo said...

WOOOOOOOOOOO-HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

I'm beyond thrilled for you girlfriend! It may be our prayers, etc., but it's also your grace, faith and determination that is getting you through this.

I'm so so so so happy!!

xoxo
Love you!
Lo♥

kj said...

i caught my breath before reading more. then:
WHEW! YAY1 HOTDAMN!

in this case i know how you are feeling, anne, and i rejoice right along side you. what a relief! you are now entitled to look ahead, including a train to n'orleans and a trip to YART. hell, why not?

seriously, i am humbled by your news.

love
kj

kj said...

oh, and the blessed light.

yes.

xo

Teri said...

FABULOUS WONDERFUL, TERRIFIC NEWS. Thank you so much for sharing it. Prayers and your strength made all the difference!
Hugs and more hugs.

marianne said...

awesome!

Robbie said...

GREAT!!!! some of us are just too stubborn to let 'bad' health issues to stop them!! So glad you are one of those!!! Way to go, Anne!!!! We'll all keep pulling for you!!!!

Dear Fireflies said...

Big hug, big hug, BIIIIG HUG!!!! Oh, I'm so happy to hear this, I'm grinning from ear to ear! I will keep praying for you, and in the mean time, keep that studio messy! :))

Laura said...

:) for you there dear

Emma said...

What a result! Just don't pinch yourself too hard, girl!

Lori ann said...

a magical photo dear anne and the BEST news.
xxx

yoborobo said...

Hi Anne! Yippeeeee ki yay!!! You are one amazing chica! xoxox Pam

Caio Fern said...

lovelovelove.
so good to have you receiving these good news.
thank God.

Deborah said...

Oh Anne!!! YIPPEEEEEEEEEE! What wonderful news! My heart has leaped out of my chest with Joy that cannot be contained. I am pinching you right now! On your arse! HA! I am internetless for now, but breathing much easier. Until we moved out of the house, I had not realized that I have been holding my breath since that last week in August. We are hoping to close on our townhouse in the next few weeks...there are renters in there until the end of March, but mention was made that perhaps they could move out sooner. Then I will have my own computer back and INTERNET!!! Strangely that is the only thing I miss of my old home. Oh God is SO good ALL the time, my Beloved Blonde One. You keep giving those cancer cells hell! Big love, Deb

Anonymous said...

Just catching up and to such such good news, so fantastic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wahoo, dancing a jig and so happy
for you. Gary must be sighing still. xox Corrine

Bunny said...

I am doing a happy happy dance. Bless you may the numbers go way way way down for you. Hugs

Rebeca Trevino said...

it has been a while since i have been making my blog-visits to my blog-friends. when i have been absent a while, and i need to catch up, i usually breezed through the images of the posts i've missed, stopping to read mainly those that call to me.

the image and title of this blog stopped me in my tracks. the image is magical.
then i read the EXCELLENT news.
very excellent news.

Anne Huskey-Lockard said...

Glad you popped in Rebeca~~Thanks much!
Wednesday is the last chemo, then we'll see where life goes from there!
I can't believe this much time has passed since I posted this....it's all a blur.
The photo was one of those moments of pure LUCK. Sun, camera, lace curtains.... :-)

XXOO~~
Anne

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